3Bee

Researchers at Punjab University claim to have discovered the reason for the decline in bee populations these last few years. They say an atmosphere full of cell phone signals gunks up the bees' workings and slows down their reproduction. The fact that bees have been dying off lately isn't controversial. Great Britain alone has recorded a 15% decline in bee populations in the last two years. And the number of Pooh bears found stuck in treeholes has similarly fallen. But to this layperson's mind, there seem to be a couple of problems with this particular study. The scientists set up two bee hives. One had working cell phones attached to it, and the other was fitted with dummy phones. They say the hive with the real phones shrunk, its queen produced fewer eggs, and its workers stopped making honey. But the thing is: cell phone signals are everywhere. Sticking a dummy phone to a bee hive isn't going to protect it from the radio signals flying through the air. Plus, similar signals have been transmitting since the dawn of radio. So why are the bees dying off now? I'm no researcher, I have no science degree, and I'm pretty much an idiot. But this smells like bullshit to me. For what that's worth. More details here.

Cover or Walk

Five female anchors at Al-Jazeera, the Arabic news network, have quit after being pressured by executives to wear more modest clothing. Lest you think Al-Jazeera is anything like Naked News, you should know that these anchors usually don't wear anything sexier than a blouse under a suit jacket. But then again, they have been known to show a hint of clavicle from time to time, which is prettyUGGGHHH!!! I just came all over my keyboard. Apparently, the key issue here is these women's refusal to cover their hair, which is seen as disgustingly provocative by a large portion of the network's Middle Eastern audience. No, their hair doesn't have tits all in it. This isn't an early "Star Trek" episode we're talking about here. It's just hair. But that's enough to throw some psychopaths into a homicidal rage. People are weird. More details here.

Eat Da Poo Poo

Uganda may be full of homicidally insane homophobes who'd love nothing more than to literally destroy the lives of all gay people within and without their borders, but it's important to let them have their say. Apparently, the reason they hate the queers has nothing to do with religious fundamentalism or even self-centered bigotry. It's all because of what should and should not be done with "doo doo". Warning: You probably shouldn't let your children watch this video, but you definitely SHOULD show them how feces is consumed through a human anus BEFORE sending them out of the room.

I Feel Better

Look, I can't embed it here, but you must click through to YouTube and watch the video for "I Feel Better" by Hot Chip. Not enough musical groups are addressing important issues about the horrible powers we just grant willy-nilly to our cancer patients.

Moonbots

The Japanese aren't letting the world economic apocalypse get them down. While NASA announced plans to sell the Space Shuttles to the highest bidder and trade the Constellation program for the right to strap our astronauts to Russia's rocket bumpers, Japan has announced its goal of building a robot moon base by 2020. Unlike the little R/C cars we've been sending to Mars, Japanese moonbots will be vaguely humanoid, with two arms, a torso, and a head-like area. Of course, this is strictly required by Japanese laws mandating that all robotic entities be at least semi-fuckable. But still. Having a functional moon base is an important step toward better exploring the solar system. Plus, it'll be a great place for space explorers to get away from the wife for a few days and fuck a robot or two. More details here.

Under the Diving Helmet

Over at The Skeptical Review, our own Karl Mamer has a lengthy and insightful interview with our own Doctor Atlantis. You may remember Doctor Atlantis for his contribution to the Amateur Scientist Podcast Halloween special or from his dealings with Glenn Beck's army of seed people. Or from some tentacle fetishist program he hosts. And you may remember Karl from his years spent chronicling mediocre podcasts and their gimpish creators. He also interviewed me for The Skeptical Review not long ago, and aside from the part about my relationship with Helen Mirren (it was STRICTLY consensual), I was quoted warmly and accurately.

Poo and Run

Public service announcement: If you're at the ATM in Toronto and someone tells you you have poop on your pants, probably best to run away. Police are investigating a series of robberies in which the perps approach ATMs and splatter patrons with liquid feces from squirt bottles. While pretending to help their marks dab at the dooky stains, the bandits then make off with a wad of cash. This is a unique approach to the old bait and switch style of short con, but I'm a little surprised it works so well. I can't think of anything more embarrassing than being caught in public with visible mudbutt except for maybe being caught in public with visible mudbutt and having someone offer to help me clean it up. I may not assume this person is a robber, but I'd definitely suspect he might be some kind of coprophile. Regardless, citizens of the greater Toronto area should be on the lookout for gentlemen skulking around ATMs with bottles full of brown liquid. So, you know, proceed as usual. More details here.