Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Pyramid Positivity

India has about 114,000 traffic fatalities a year. This is mostly because many Indian drivers are never taught how to drive a car, roads collapse into each other like an M.C. Escher drawing, and Indian teens have only just caught up to 1950s California dragster culture. (Only one of these is a lie.) But one mystic says traffic accidents are mostly caused by negative energy, and he plans to reduce them by installing pyramids near crash-prone intersections. Local police in Nagpur are allowing this expert in Vasnu (basically Indian Feng Shui) to place ten copper-bottom pyramids in these areas to see if they really do emit positivity rays. It’s a nearly risk-free situation, since the pyramids aren’t costing the government anything, and they’ll also continue to try and curb road deaths through more traditional means. The only real danger here is that cars might crash into the pyramids themselves, which will obviously be filled with deadly, perpetually sharp razor blades. More details here.