Tuesday, January 26, 2010

Bad Idea

Oh, scientists. When will you learn that just because you can do a thing, it doesn't mean you should? Thanks for the vaccines and the computers and the butt implants and everything else that makes life something more bearable than a constant attempt at not being eaten, but I don't need you bringing giant, horrible creatures back from the grave of extinction. Scientists don't listen to me, though. They're going ahead with plans to bring back the auroch, an elephantine type of cattle that terrified Europe with its massive horns for generations before finally being wiped out four hundred years ago. I can see the appeal in resurrecting some creatures. Woolly mammoths are mostly harmless. They just hang out in back alleys and explain to Big Bird where babies come from. But gargantuan bulls can't contribute anything to society other than the occasional closed casket funeral due to the body being gored beyond recognition. Not to invoke Hitler in this argument, but the last person to attempt reviving the auroch was HITLER! It's true. A pair of Nazi zoologists were tasked with breeding the auroch back into existence as a symbol of Aryan mastery of genetics. Plus, Herman Goering wanted to use them as stock for the hunting preserve he planned to build on top of Eastern Europe. So, you know, I'm just saying. More details here.