Aliens Aflame

Three years ago, the village of Canneto di Caronia in northern Sicily suffered a spate of unexplained fires in TV's, fridges, and other appliances. Understandably, demons were the first suspect. The Vatican's chief exorcist, Father Gabriele Amorth, even said he'd seen demons possess electrical goods before. "Let's not forget," he warned, "that Satan and his followers have immense powers." However, the Italian government commissioned a report on the matter. After a two year investigation costing about $2 million and involving dozens of experts, the report has finally been released. The official hypothesis? Aliens. Specifically, aliens testing some kind of high-powered energy weapon. Lest you say nay, the report does back up its claim with evidence. It mentions an an area of inexplicably burned grass found outside the village. UFO landing site? Most likely. If one were to traverse the vast distances of space, you can't use a more efficient system than flaming rocket propulsion. Read all about it here.