Return of the Cracker

University of Central Florida student Webster Cook has returned the Holy Eucharist he abducted from a campus church and held hostage in a Ziploc bag. For our non-Catholic friends, the Holy Eucharist is also known as "The Body of Christ", but is actually just a flavorless cracker the self-deluded pretend is Jesus' man-meat. Cook bowed to the pressure of numerous letters from distressed Catholics both physically threatening him and rationally explaining why stealing crackers makes them cry. The primary concern of those upset by Cook's pilfering was that he would somehow "desecrate" the cracker instead of doing what he was supposed to--popping it in his mouth, pulverizing it with his teeth, digesting it in his gut, and shitting it out. More details here. And more on the fallout from this cracker abduction here.