Bristol Palin: Voice of, Like, Reason

Remember how John McCain once had that cancer attached to him? Well, that cancer had a daughter, and her name was Bristol Palin. At seventeen, Bristol became pregnant and remained that way throughout her mother’s vice presidential campaign. This caused a bit of a stir, considering the Republican Party has long promoted so-called “abstinence only education”, which isn’t so much education as it is making kids sign papers promising they won’t play with each other’s privates. Mostly because playing with privates is fun, this kind of crap doesn’t stop teenagers from having sex. Instead, it just raises their risk of pregnancy and STDs because the part-time preacher that gave them their promise rings never mentioned how to roll on a condom. Now, Bristol has joined the voices of reason, declaring in a recent interview that abstinence indoctrination is “not realistic”. Of course, she also added that abstinence is still the best option for teens. This is kind of like saying Pegasus is the best option for air travel. Palin went on to discourage other teens from following in her footsteps. “It's just, like, I'm not living for myself anymore. It's, like, for another person, so it's different. And just you're up all night. And it's not glamorous at all. Like, your whole priorities change after having a baby,” she said. That is, like, so true. More details here.